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Lebowski Urban Achiever
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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
Well, I got my new car today. After a lot of research and test drives, I decided on a brand new, ‘01 Radium Sentra SE. 5 spd, A/C, sunroof, CD...loaded. Thankfully, it's a 4dr. Gotta have plenty of room for my buds. I've listened to many people's suggestions and have decided to take the following steps to properly break-in my new car. First thing I did when I left the dealer was to drain 2 quarts of that crappy 'break-in' oil from the crankcase. I heard that the metal parts seal better with only 2 qts. of oil (Only for the first 1500 miles, though. Don't want to hurt the engine!) Then I let out exactly 18 lbs. of air from each tire. This was to give the suspension a good workout; not to mention the tires. I then popped the hood, removed the air cleaner, and punched several holes in the filter element. I understand N/A engines like to breathe a little easier during break-in. I then drove to the local municipal airport where a friend of mine has a job washing and waxing small planes. He really knows his stuff about engines...working around them all day, and stuff. He's 34 and makes 47K a year! On top of that, he gets his B.S. in BS this summer. I'd be a fool not to follow his suggestions. Anyway, he cops a tankful of 100 octane 'Avgas' from this Cesna 152 he's been washing and we dump it in my (nearly) empty tank. This stuff is so cool it's BLUE! I kid you not! Also, it's rated 'low lead' and my friend tells me this is the best thing to run in my new engine as it provides a nice cushion for my new valvetrain. Plus, the higher the octane, the better. Or so he tells me. Hey, he may "pull on the Piper" pretty often but he's still pretty sharp! On top of the Avgas, he also said it's good to run the car under some type of a load for the first few hundred miles. Turns out, he has an old "U-Haul" trailer in one of the hangers and it's practically FILLED with old Lycoming and Continental engines that need to be salvaged. BOOYA! I back my new SE (ever so gingerly....don't want to scratch her) up to the trailer and we hook it up. My rear bumper drops to the freakin' pavement but my friend says not to worry. Along with deflated tires, this is good for the suspension. Hey, he's 34 and has owned 14 cars. I think I can trust his experience. Well, my car is idling kinda noisy but I'm told this is normal and will get quieter over time. I'm ready. I engage the clutch. I give her some gas. My friend says "C'mon! Bounce her of the redline a few times then pop it!" OK. I rev it up to nearly 7,000 RPM's a few times then *BOOM*, I pop the clutch. The car makes this really loud groan and lurches ahead. The car is bucking wildly like an untamed horse! Good thing Ozzy’s ‘Crazy Train’ is blaring on my new CD player. I keep her floored and we start to move a little faster. Still pretty shaky. It takes a little while but I finally get to the redline again. I bounce it off the limiter a few times (I wanna do this right) and yank it into second hoping to catch a little rubber. Instead, the tires make this....this....sound. Ever listen to someone throwing-up? I mean *really* blowing chunks? THAT'S what it sounded like! Well, I'm going about 30 mph by now. The car is shaking violently but there's this smell. I have no idea what it is or where it's coming from but I'm not worried. I just roll down my (yeah!) power windows. There's a couple of lights on the dash (2 red, 1 yellow) but I can't read them due the vibration. I'm near the redline and my new Nissan is running like a raped ape! I throw her into third and everything calms down a little. Thing is, I'm running out of room and approaching some traffic in the airport park. Thank God for anti-lock brakes! I jam my foot down on the brake pedal and the car starts shaking and making the puke sound all over again! All of a sudden, the U-Haul snaps real hard to the right and starts pulling my baby around in a circle! SMASH! The trailer smashes into my 2 side doors and starts to lean, taking my cremepuff with it. Luckily, the trailer finally breaks free from my car (not before taking some really strange looking parts with it) and slides to a rest about 6' from this Piper Cadet. Whew! In the process, my right rear wheel flies off the hub and rolls away. My rotor slams into the pavement, sparks like crazy, and leaves like a 20' groove before stopping. I'm pretty freaked out and so are some other folks who saw this go down. I get out of my SE (now a beaten old smelly hag of a car) and walk to the phone to call AAA. Man, I sure am glad I have full coverage! I think I learned a lesson today: Never, and I mean NEVER buy a Mexican-made car ;-) Thank you for listening…
 

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Did you forget to install the hitch for UHAUL?????
I was just "helping" a friend to move. He wanted to pull a trailer with his 2001 Altima. People from UHAUL told him that Altima can pull about 1000lbs but the trailer is about 800lbs.
Maybe you should install hitch first. Just a suggestion.
 

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Fogey
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Hahaha......

who has the bullshit flag... Need a big one for this post.
 

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RWD is teh bomb
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I think it's pretty obvious this is a gag email. I don't think it was too funny..but it did have its moments. lol
 

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Another question.
Did you total you "old" sentra????
 

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How much of a jackass are you? You obvoiusly dont know what the hell you are doing. You may want to try towing the airplane instead of the U-Haul next time. The stuff you put in your gas tank might also go well in a cup of coffee.
 

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C'mon guys, don't be fooled......

Here is what I think of this:
 

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In another time or place...this could be funny!

Someone should delete this thread.
 

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Still Faster Then You...
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this had me going for a while and i was saying the whole time what a moron, and you people say i post BS, yeah well this beats me...
 

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Lebowski Urban Achiever
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275 Posts
Discussion Starter · #18 ·
What a bunch of humorless twits that populate this board.

Especially the one that called me a failed abortion! Holy Jebus!!

Lighten up, ladies. I was only trying to have a little bit of fun due to a very strong cup of coffee during a slow spot after lunch.

Also, keep in mind kids that I own a (well-maintained and gently broken-in) '00 Sentra SE. But you know what I realized a long time ago?

It's only a fucking car, gnome sane?
 

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I thought it was pretty funny

It was so outragous that there is no way anyone could have thought it was real. So lighten up and laugh a little!
 
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